Unconditional Love

Someone had a greeting card. It said, “Jesus Loves You,” on the front accompanied by a pair of praying hands. Inside is says, “Everyone else thinks you’re a jerk.” The once praying hands were giving the finger.

When I saw that I thought that Jesus might think the guy is a jerk too but loves him anyway. That’s unconditional love, I thought. The lover loves the loved unconditionally not based on the actions of the loved or characteristics. The person could still be a first class jerk but still be loved. I may think you’re a jerk, but I love you anyway. I thought that way for years.

I was wrong.

It took an entire family to show me the definition of true unconditional love. In 1996 I went to Honduras. I met a nice family. They took me in. Mom and dad, two sons and two daughters. I married the older daughter. But they all seemed to like me.

I had heard through the grapevine that the younger daughter, about 12 years old at the time, used to brag about me to her friends telling them how wonderful I am. Nobody had ever said or thought that I was wonderful. “I have a brother-in-law. He’s nice. He bought me this dress.” Then someone told me they overheard the younger sister and younger brother arguing over which one of them I liked best.

I always lose the badmouth wars. If I tick someone off, they are certain to go around badmouthing me to other people. People listen to that and take it as gospel truth and believe whole-heartedly. Not with them. I had a dispute with one of the brothers, and after that I thought, “O well, the good times are over.” They understood the dispute, but they didn’t just write me off. They continued to love me for the good they saw in me.

Am I a jerk? Yes, I am a jerk, and they love me anyway. But that’s not all there is to it. They were able to see good things in me. They saw the good in me. He’s nice. He gave me this. He’s funny. The unconditional love they had spurred them to see good things in me.

While we were yet sinners, Christ died for us. But he saw something in us. There is something about us that is valuable to him. He didn’t just say, “O you’re all depraved sinners unworthy of my love, but I’ll die for you anyway just cuz I’m a nice guy.” No. God sees something in us, something in every one of us that benefits him or that pleases him.